Escape to Paradise: Serene Heights by Evernent Miri, Malaysia
Escape to Paradise: Serene Heights by Evernent Miri, Malaysia
Alright, buckle up buttercups, because we're diving headfirst into a whirlwind review of… well, you know, the hotel. Let's just say I've spent a few nights there, and the experience… well, it's a whole thing. Let's get messy with it, shall we?
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First Impressions, Because That's Where It Starts (or Doesn't?)
So, I arrive ready to be pampered. First thing I check, because, you know, LIFE, accessibility.
Wheelchair Accessibility: I'm good to go. Now, the "Facilities for disabled guests" are listed, which is great to see in the list, and they do, in fact, list it. Nice! Big plus for the Elevator since I'm not looking to hike up fifteen floors!
The Great Wi-Fi Quest (and Other Internet Shenangigans):
Okay, let's be real. In this day and age, Wi-Fi is practically oxygen. And here, it's…well, it's there. Thank goodness for Free Wi-Fi in all rooms! as it's listed - I'm a bit of a digital nomad so I was happy for the Internet Access- Wireless. The signal in the lobby? Spotty. In my room? Pretty good, but I swear I saw a guy in the hallway trying to catch a signal by holding his phone aloft like a digital offering to the Wi-Fi gods. There is also Internet [LAN] in the room but you really shouldn't rely on that. I used the Wi-Fi for what I needed to.
Cleanliness and Safety: The COVID-19 Gauntlet
I am a person who is, shall we say, concerned when it comes to cleanliness. I'm talking full-blown, Purell-carrying, socially-distanced paranoia. When I checked the list, I noticed they put a lot of stuff on there, which is a good sign, if a little overwhelming. The Hand sanitizers were everywhere (thank goodness). The staff wears masks. Most of the Anti-viral cleaning products were there, they also do Daily disinfection in common areas and between stays and they did this. They also boast Professional-grade sanitizing services. They are committed to be being safe. I checked the Hygiene certification box, but that could be more visible - more visible is always better! They even offered a Room sanitization opt-out available!
Room Reality: The Good, the Bad, and the Extra Long Bed
Alright, let's talk about the room. Mine checked out, which is a great way to put it. I liked the carpeting. I appreciated having a closet. Air conditioning was fully working. Big check. I had a Desk, but only used it once, because, you know, relaxing. I also had a safe, satellite channels, slippers, smoke detector, telephone, and a window that opens, and everything listed. BUT the real star was the Extra long bed. Seriously, I’m talkin’ comfort. I think I slept vertically at one point. It was glorious.
The Spa: A Deep Dive into Relaxation (and a Few Minor Mishaps)
Okay, the spa. This is where it gets interesting. They have a Spa, of course. The Sauna was hot, the Steamroom was steamy. There were Massages, a Body wrap, and yes, even a Foot bath. I opted for all of the above.
One tiny hiccup: The "relaxing" music in the treatment room? Let's just say it occasionally sounded like a dying synthesizer. But the masseuse was amazing. Pure bliss. I almost fell asleep and forgot I was stressed out!
Restaurants, Restaurants, Everywhere! (And a Few Disappointments)
This hotel had a frankly ridiculous amount of dining options!! From the Asian breakfast and Asian cuisine in the restaurant, to Western breakfast and Western cuisine in the restaurant. I mean, Desserts in the restaurant, coffee/tea in the restaurant. This is listed! And it's there!
I have to say that I thought the A la carte in restaurant was great, though the service was a little slow in certain spots, which is a bummer. Also, the poolside bar had a poolside bar. And the salad in the restaurant was a welcome treat! And the snack bar? Well, it was what it was.
Getting Around: Airport Transfers and the Great Parking Struggle
So, I didn't have to worry about Airport transfer, though it's nice that they provide that. The valet parking was an option. There is also Car park [free of charge], but finding a spot can be an adventure. Think Hunger Games, only with less gladiatorial combat and more passive aggression over parking spaces. And no, there wasn’t a Car power charging station.
Other Amenities and Services: The Good, the Bad, and the Slightly Odd
- For the Kids: I don’t have kids, but the hotel advertised Babysitting service and Kids facilities.
- Business Facilities: There were Business facilities, including Meeting/banquet facilities and Audio-visual equipment for special events. Seemed legit.
- Services and Conveniences: They have a Concierge, Daily housekeeping, and Luggage storage.
The Verdict (AKA The Messy Finale)
So, would I recommend staying here? Honestly? Yes, probably. The pros (the bed, the spa, the general level of cleanliness) definitely outweigh the cons (the occasional slow service, the parking situation). It's not perfect, but there is something special about this place. I think it feels luxurious!
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P.S. Don't forget to pack your swimsuit and your sense of adventure! You might even win at parking. Or not. Either way it's an experience. Just embrace the mess and enjoy it!
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Alright, buckle up, buttercups, because you're about to dive headfirst into my Serene Heights adventure. "Serene" in the name? Hah! Let's see if that holds up after a few days with me…
The Absolutely Chaotic Serene Heights Itinerary (Or, How I Learned to Stop Worrying and Love the Mosquitoes)
Day 1: Arrival and a Near-Disaster (The "Lost Luggage and Existential Dread" Starter Pack)
- Morning (8:00 AM): Okay, flight's landed! Finally. Miri Airport - surprisingly…normal. Bags? Nope. Mine decided to take a scenic route to, I assume, Reykjavik. (Don’t judge my travel insurance choices, okay?!) Panic level: Mildly elevated, like a caffeinated hummingbird. Started filing the necessary reports. Spent the next hour alternately glaring at the baggage carousel and mentally replaying all the outfits I packed… and everything I'd left behind. (Seriously, why did I only bring one pair of decent hiking boots?!)
- Late Morning (11:00 AM): Check-in at Evernent Miri. Gorgeous place, I'll give it that. The lobby smelled faintly of sandalwood and… hope? Maybe. The receptionist, a wonderfully patient woman named Mei, seemed unfazed by my luggage-less state. Bless her. She hooked me up with a temporary toothbrush and a pitying smile.
- Afternoon (1:00 PM): Lunch at the hotel restaurant. The buffet… well, it was a buffet. Tried everything. Regret nothing. The Sarawak Laksa was heavenly – a symphony of spice and coconut milk. My mood: lifted. Luggage? Still missing. Existential dread? Subsided… slightly.
- Afternoon/Early Evening(2:30 PM): Took a dip in the hotel pool, which was a mistake. The water was lovely, the sun warm…but the mosquitoes! They descended upon me with a ferocity I haven't experienced since that time I tried to eat a picnic lunch at a swamp. They ate my happiness, my blood, and possibly my soul. Slathered myself in DEET, vow to never stray near foliage again.
- Evening (6:00 PM): Dinner at the hotel's restaurant, again. No luggage, no clothes… I look like a drowned rat. My stomach rumbles a little. Ordered the fried rice. Great decision. The fried rice, accompanied by a glass of iced teh tarik, was absolute perfection. My heart, and my stomach, started to settle, The hotel staff had taken pity on me and lent me a t-shirt from their lost-and-found. It smelled faintly of floral detergent, and it was glorious.
Day 2: Into the Jungle (And Faceplant Potential!)
- Morning (7:00 AM): Early start! Actually, I was awake all night. My hotel room didn't have blackout curtains -- a crucial detail. I'm a light sleeper, and the streetlights have the habit of keeping me up. I’m a shadow of my usual self. Today's plan? A guided hike through the rainforest. Despite my current level of sleep deprivation, I couldn't imagine NOT experiencing the jungle.
- Morning (9:00 AM): The guide, a very jolly man named Raj, with a voice like a foghorn, met us at the lobby. Raj was a legend. He knew every plant, every bug, every… everything.
- Late Morning/Early Afternoon (10:00 AM -1:00 PM): The hike. Oh. My. God. Beautiful. Absolutely breathtaking, the air thick with the scent of damp earth and, I swear, a million different flowers I couldn't name. The monkeys! The monkeys were playing in the trees, chattering and occasionally, dropping branches. The sounds of nature…just unbelievable. At one point, Raj pointed out a pitcher plant the size of my head. Me, in my borrowed t-shirt, nearly faceplanted into the mud when a particularly cheeky monkey seemed to take a swipe at my hair. My dignity hung by a thread. And the mosquitoes were back, of course.
- Afternoon (2:00 PM): Lunch in a basic cafe outside the park. Some kind of local noodles. Spicy. Delicious. My taste buds were on fire. I decided that I loved this country.
- Afternoon (3:00 PM): Back at the hotel. Showered, mostly to get rid of the sweat, the mud, and the lingering fear of jungle beasties. A nap was absolutely critical.
- Evening (6:00 PM): Dinner at a local hawker stall, recommended by Raj. Sat at a plastic table under the stars, devouring grilled fish and fresh mango juice. The food was cheap, the company was questionable (I think I was surrounded by a family of cats), and the experience? Priceless. It was magic.
Day 3: Culture Shock and Retail Apocalypse (Or, "I Bought Too Many Sarongs")
- Morning (9:00 AM): Visited a local market. It was… overwhelming. People bustling everywhere, the air thick with the aroma of spices I'd never encountered, and a cacophony of sounds. I felt like I’d walked into a technicolor dream. I spent way too long haggling over a ridiculously cheap sarong. Another. And another. And…okay, maybe I have a minor shopping problem.
- Late Morning (11:00 AM): Explored a local museum. Learned more about the history of the region. The exhibits were fascinating. The air conditioning, even more fascinating. It was a beautiful break.
- Afternoon (1:00 PM): Lunch at a local restaurant. I tried the Ayam Penyet. I could have eaten ten. Delicious.
- Afternoon (3:00 PM): Went back to the hotel to get some new clothes. My luggage was still missing. The hotel staff had taken pity on me and lent me a t-shirt from their lost-and-found. It smelled faintly of floral detergent, and it was glorious.
- Evening (6:00 PM): Dinner in the hotel restaurant again. I ordered the fried rice. Great decision. The fried rice, accompanied by a glass of iced teh tarik, was absolute perfection. The hotel staff had taken pity on me and lent me a t-shirt from their lost-and-found. It smelled faintly of floral detergent, and it was glorious. I can’t stress this enough.
Day 4: River Cruise and Regret (Mostly Regarding Sunscreen Application)
- Morning (8:00 AM): A boat ride along the Baram River. Finally, something serene! For like, ten minutes. Then the sun decided to channel the energy of a thousand suns, and I forgot to reapply sunscreen. Major. Regret.
- Late Morning(10:00 AM): The river was beautiful, though. The lush greenery. The occasional crocodile (I'm pretty sure!). The birds! I have never seen so many different species of birds. Beautiful.
- Afternoon (1:00 PM): Lunch on the boat, a picnic of sorts. I ate so much food. I had to fight off a squirrel. It was not pretty.
- Afternoon (2:00 PM): The boat ride was almost over. I decided that this was a nice moment.
- Late Afternoon (4:00 PM): Back at the hotel, already feeling the burn. The sunburn was starting to cook. Took the most glorious, ice-cold shower. The mosquitoes were back. I fought the urge to cry myself to sleep.
- Evening (6:00 PM): Dinner. I decided that I needed a break. I ordered the fried rice. Great decision. The fried rice, accompanied by a glass of iced teh tarik, was absolute perfection.
Day 5: Departure (And a Vow to Return…With Better Luggage)
- Morning (9:00 AM): Packing (what little I had). My luggage? Still MIA. The airline promised to forward it to my next location. They would, right? (Deep breath…)
- Late Morning (11:00 AM): One last Sarawak Laksa at the hotel restaurant. It's my new religion, I swear.
- Afternoon (12:00 PM): Headed to the airport. Serene Heights, you beautiful, mosquito-infested, culturally-rich, slightly-sunburnt, and absolutely unforgettable place. I'll be back. And next time, I'm buying the industrial-strength mosquito repellent.
- Afternoon (1:00 PM): Flight. I slept. I cried. I was the opposite of serene. My luggage? Still MIA. Sigh.
Final Verdict: Serene Heights? Maybe not. But amazing? Absolutely. Would I go back? In a heartbeat. Just, you know, with better luggage and a hazmat suit for the mosquitoes. And a whole lot of sunscreen.
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